Top 10 Reasons To Become An Evangelical

by Richard Rothstein

Top Ten Reasons To Become An Evangelical:

Just what we needed: another ex-gay website designed to save us form temptation and sin. Victor J. Adamson "explodes the gay myth" of "Once gay, always gay!" According to Mr. Adamson's good news press release, this professional former homosexual and now husband and father, pastor, radio and TV evangelist, international speaker and concert musician, is offering assistance in understanding and overcoming homosexuality." His new online resource provides support for those struggling with the Homosexual Issue and/or Orientation to help them live successfully and happily in accordance with Biblical principles, based upon his own personal testimony, research, and experience.


Stepping up to restore confidence in Evangelism after that terrible Ted Haggard scandal, Pastor Adamson asks, "Do you have a son or daughter, a brother or sister, or a special loved one of any relation or of no relation who is Gay - Homosexual? Is your loved one out there wandering in the Valley of the Lost Sheep, wondering "Why me?" Are you yourself, perhaps, struggling with the Homosexual Orientation, or with some other besetting sin or addiction in your own life? And, as a result, are you wavering in your own personal relationship with Christ, your Creator and Savior?"

"The purpose of this Web Site is to share with you what Christ has done in my own personal life to save me from a downward spiral that was leading me in this life to ultimate destruction, and, even worse, to eternal destruction rather than life everlasting."

Now people who know me would imagine that this is where I start raving and ranting and ripping Reverend Adamson a new pleasure portal. But no. Not at all. Having studied ex-gays and Evangelical leaders closely over these past couple of years, I've come to a very different place and would urge you to reconsider your negative thoughts about these people.

Fellow Sodomites, I offer unto you the top ten reasons to become an Evangelical:

1. Fantasy sex with teen boys.

2. Loyal female slave who keeps your home clean, does your laundry and prepares your meals.

3. Unlimited access to pretty white boy virgins who are fully loaded and ready for bear.

4. Unlimited travel and entertainment expense account that's never audited.

5. More action than a dozen gay bars.

6. Crystal meth home deliveries.

7. Best pick-up lines: "I had dinner at the White House last night."

8. Tax-exempt six figure salaries and lavish mid to upper six figure private estates.

9. The right to blame all your mistakes, faults and misdeeds on Satan.

10. Eternal life.

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So? Is this an irresistible lifestyle choice or what?